By: Jiyan Jane Fan
i want her.
my heart is heavy with a parasite called love,
a tapeworm that has destroyed its cage of amber
and curls up in my shattered bone,
a lust that bleeds gasoline unstaunched and pours like milk and honey
every night, like ritual slaughter,
a leech rips my chest open to taste my heart.
with her fingers for knives, she carves me up and puts the pieces back
thank you, my love
i am hers i am hers i will forever be hers
…
he wants me.
he strangles the parasite lodged
as i lament at the shrine of a man
(named God, with the face of my father and a dozen boys)
with his fingers for knives, he nicks my vena cava.
i bleed out in his hands
he shreds me into red ribbons and ravages me into corse
i give myself up to him
our father, who art in heaven
i am his i am his i
…
i long for her
…